she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I feel the need to clarify that I did not show her my vagina.
You're doing that 'overestimating how much I care' thing again.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Seriously how many times do I have to sleep with him before he stops calling me dude
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
Stop thinking about me and go on your date... at least I got the glitter off your face first.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Randomize