The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
ttyl tear gas
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
Hey girl, do you remember you made me brush your hair with a plastic fork on Saturday night?
We're about to play the try not to vom at the president's house game...
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Im showing up stoned and in sweatpants. Because that is where im at in life right now. Sorry not sorry.
You don't feed me, fuck me, or fulfill me.
Randomize
