As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
false alarm. still invincible.
so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Funny how often beer equates to second degree burns on some portion of my body.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
rest in peace liver.
It was nice having you occupy space in my body that could be holding beer n chicken.
that's going in my livers obituary.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
