Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
I mean... It's a win/win situation. I mentor the kid for an hour and then I get to fuck his mom. I know deep down I'm helping them both
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
No. I either had a 6 minute orgasm or I had so many I lost count. I'm still not sure.
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
I'll remember. Also, I owe you 200 for a pair of shoes that I carelessly bought to improve my spinal structure, to improve my health and ensure that I love to be 300 years old. Like Adam. Of the bible.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
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