i wonder what thom yorke's orgasms sound like
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Why is there a blood-covered "sorry about your stuff" note stapled to my door?
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
he asked me why I let you steal the gnome, and you jumped out of the bathroom, yelled "you know why!" and ran outside with said gnome
Randomize
