apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
I have shoes on. No pants. And my jacket pockets are full of ketchup and grass. Yes. Good night.
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
We found you on the floor drooling you kept saying over and over how you were double jointed.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
Mark just took 50mg Viagra. Tonight should be interesting for the neighbors.
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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