Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
I'm sitting on the patient chair, waiting for my vagina to be violated & "i don't want to miss a thing" has been playing on repeat. WHY IS THIS HAPPENING TO ME.
Thanks for alerting everyone in our apartment what your one night stand's name is. Could you scream a little louder?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Beautiful fucking linguistics Shakespeare, but youre still not doing that to my face
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
She asked if i could guess "what shape her carpet was". I got it wrong (christmas tree).
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
Dude I had sex with her and she STILL thinks I'm gay. I don't know what else to do.
Randomize
