is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
Just had a random flashback of you tickling some guy's nipple with your claw ring, and then him moaning and stripping in the middle of the bar. You give good memories.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
He gave me the choice between a threeway with his best friend or a tiny turtle. Unfortunately I chose the threeway.
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
I have 2 voicemails from u last night. one of them is just 5 min of u saying "doodling"...
But I thought it was so funny last night
You also thought you were a gypsy mermaid last night
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
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