You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize
