Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
we went through the mcdonalds drive through and you asked for a free sample of their fries to see how you liked them.
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
I legitimately forgot how to blow my nose just now. Sleep might be handy.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
So, Kevin dropping me off at urgent care. Seems my tampon slipped out of reach. Even after he tried to get it out with some kitchen tongs.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Randomize
