Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
just saw bouncers outside a coffee shop. beginning to question humanity.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
You're telling me you've never sent a picture of your cock to a girl and then were all like "Oops, sorry, wrong person! By the way...You like?"
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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