Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
She took a crow from her moms Halloween decorations, taped it to her shoulder, went to the bar and made the guys buy a drinks for both her and the crow.
gladiator or hannah montana?
This is why I never have to ask who you are when I get a new phone.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Hey super random I have you in my phone as "downtown likes to go fishing girl" haha does that sound like you
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
I would give a kidney to fuck him and he knows it. That bastard.
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
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