you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
