is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
my memory may be fuzzy, but the 20+ naked pictures I sent him were surprising clear
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
Dude you literally tried to cook your phone in the microwave. You were so wasted you asked your mom to help you turn it on.
I'm ready to run through the streets naked yelling "HES ALIVE!"
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Randomize
