New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
Posting happy birthday to my grandpa on Facebook.... Then realizing my profile pic is me dressed as a slutty cop when he used to be a police officer.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
I was like sure, i'll have a drink or two to end the night early. Next thing i know theres a ton of dudes in my house and like 3 gallons of wine. I cant do anything in moderation.
Randomize
