i was just at lovers lane looking for gifts for a bachelorette party.....with my mom
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
So I'm about to go to his house and have "I'm really sorry for cheating on you last night" sex
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Russians do not operate on the same level as the rest of us. hoping I wake up tomorrow
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
The hardest part about being a child of divorce is when you're at your dad's house but your condoms are at your mom's house.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
