The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
I just sang country roads at the top of my lungs with my cab driver. Tonight was a success.
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
When someone's woman crush wednesday is an ultrasound of her unborn daughter...
I can't
"Local woman assaults strangers with sex toy" is a headline I never want to be about me.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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