sorry about last night, sometimes people just get drunk and have sex witht heir friends
I know, I was there.
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
i found her turbo button.....if you know what i mean.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
C'mon. I'm still an alcoholic at heart, regardless of its broken or not
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
I think about him when I masturbate so I guess you could call it love
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I'm like a great zombie Jesus.
Put my boyfriend in a chastity cage while he was passed out last night. Now I control his orgasms.
Randomize
