But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
They have an open bar at this baby shower. I was born to be Cuban.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
I need a thor helmet and I need to find my heavy duty drinking mug
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
He was gunna drive a half hour for a makeout sesh. Time to take the diapers off and learn about the wonders of the penis, dude
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Idk what's worse.... Yesterday not waking up in my bed or today waking up in the hello kitty gown.
Randomize
