i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
I'll start drinking again when I know where I am
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
That doesn't help it make any more sense. Because now you've brought pinata condoms into this.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
we will now reference it as "the infamous double dick night"
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Too hungover to brush my teeth. took a swig of menthol schnapps instead. lazy or incredibly efficient?
Youre my hero
I'm gonna make out with this 38 yr old. Mark my words. I don't even have daddy issues.
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