The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
It's like you don't even want to get drunk with me everyday, anymore.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
i feel this will be the best possible way to start a friendship. By breaking into his house.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
Randomize
