WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
It's like having an annoying little brother who wants to have sex with you
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
He's stripped out of his boxers and is dancing and slapping his dick with string cheese...I don't know whether to call for help or take a video.
Randomize