You're so nebulous sometimes
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
He tipped the stripper with quarters. After that not even the waitress would talk to us. I had to move to another table to get a lapdance
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
She just shoved like three McNuggets in her mouth and started sobbing and I have no idea what's going on.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Last night I somehow got INCREDIBLY wasted & thought it was a good idea to make a group chat with all the guys I'm hooking up with and just say "bye." soo I'm hiding out till next week.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Dude chill patience is a virtue.
WHY DOES PATIENCE HAVE TO BE A VIRTUE, WHY CAN'T HURRY THE FUCK UP BE A VIRTUE?
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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