we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
i'm waiting for the less fat version of him to text me
This was worse than the time that I shot a bald eagle.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I had to have my mom pick me up from the party and the windows lock was on so when I went to projectile vomit out the window it wouldn't roll down and it splashed back at my face.
I got a message from the hook up gods today that it's time to move on. It came in the form of me being shoved in a closet naked and stuck in there for 30 min well he watched boy meets world with his brother.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
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