3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Periods are much less exciting when you're not sexually active.
Randomize
