Well all I remember is going to sleep being big spoon to you and waking up being little spoon to *****
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Randomize
