Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Cute underage boy is in my house.
OH MY GOD. DON'T DO ANYTHING. WHY IS HE IN YOUR HOUSE.
You slid down the wall and got into the fetal position. He was definitely judging... I was judging....
Just told my mom I need money for Molly. She was not happy
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
We had sex and then I offered him a cookie...while he was still inside of me. Basically he's in love
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
He had to put his grandma's photo away before I tied him to the bed. She doesn't need to see any of that.
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
Randomize
