I didn't think it was possible for the human body to be physically dependant on weed until I moved in with this kid
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Bro what are you doing Thursday the day before I go to jail??
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
You thought there were zombies attacking us so you tried to tuck and roll out of a moving vehicle. Also you should consider wearing underwear
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
