what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
Come see our sink grown plant.
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
You were running around with scissors offering people free haircuts.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
it's like his penis is God's way of saying "sorry about his face"
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
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