Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
You walked in with a bag of weed and asked for a watermelon. For some reason they actually gave you one, and you made it into a perfectly working bong. Two of them offered their girlfriends to you for the night.
They made Game of Thrones Oreos. Kill me.
Randomize
