are you still at the devil's house?
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
Technically this isn't a church so we could have been drinking this whole time.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
Btw his name is Woody. I must be really drunk to think this is a good situation
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize
