ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
you know it takes a lot for me to use utensils conservatively
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
He invited me over for shower sex and pizza. Officially the best booty call relationship around.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
just caught myself putting beer in the oven and pizza in the fridge. i should be a trainwreck by tonight.
Randomize
