girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I just ate a whole bag of celery instead of getting up to get a glass of water. That high.
I really shouldn't have to apologize. It was your own damn fault for opening a tab at the bar and telling me about it.
I've taken to hiding pictures of us around his room so that he'll forever feel guilty for dumping me on Valentine's Day... And to potentially cock block any hook ups.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
i just googled coccaine effects on sexual performance..maybe im dating the wrong guy
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
Found your bra
Where?
Hanging in the tree
Randomize
