I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
we told the drug dealer that our car was dead and we needed a jump so he would bring the drugs to us...
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
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