I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Puked in a cab. Passed out on my floor an my mom put a blanket over me. Home by 1045. I won shitshow trophy last night.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Get the fuck buddy a birthday present or not? He def deserves one, but how do I explain the debit card charge to my husband?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
Still trying to figure out where I was when someone broke the lawn chair and put it in the bathroom.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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