It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
As i looked at his penis, it stared back into my soul. No more drinking games.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
From time to time I think I'm happy for a second and then I remember how a guy stopped me from giving him head on my birthday weekend.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
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