Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
I found a big gulp cup full of vomit in my freezer, are you behind this?
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
I was looking at your puke while I was peeing in it the next morning and that ceasar salad did not treat you well
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Her vagina was like a painting you can put your face in.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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