whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
why is every porn film shot in the same house? with the same red couch!?!
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I'm gonna die fat and alone and all they will find is pizza crusts
Just spun two beer bottles and Placed them in my pockets perfect... I feel like the clint eastwood of drunks
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
It was going great until he started saying "ooh kill em" under his breath with each thrust
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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