so im watching realhousewives of jersey with my mom. she just said they werent really rich bc they were doing their own makeup.
Did you know that when you swallow it's like 60 calories!?
That's okay, it's all protein anyway.
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
i dont even know how to be here
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
Stripping out of my teacher clothes to Talk Dirty to Me. Who let me become a teacher?
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
