dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Let's be honest, your relationships fail because the man you're looking for is the equivalent of an intellectual blow-up doll.
Was my shirt on fire at any point last night? Because I'm fairly sure my shirt was on fire.
Hungover in church. I can feel stained glass Jesus judging me.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
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