that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
Just so everyone's clear, it was already on fire when I got there.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
You can be responsible and still be on that ho life
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
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