seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
it was like eating out sand paper
I just mistook a monk for someone with the newest colored snuggie.
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
Sorry I dragged you across a parking lot
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
It's 90 percent alcohol, and 10 percent a whisper that says "get drunk"
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
i got drunk and started dancing with the plant because you were out of town
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