Mel Gibson is dating a 24 year old
You're not Mel Gibson and I'm not 24.
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
I'm washing down the sadness with shots of vodka.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
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