We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
Just saw a girl in a wheelchair puke then rally. Diversity matters.
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
An hour ago, you were stranded out of state, and now you're getting laid? You are a god. Whatever you do, don't ask her name.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
Randomize