Do you think there is vodka in heaven?
you let me eat a milky way from your vagina. G is not lettin you hang out for eternity
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
'fingered' and 'feelings' NEVER belong in the same sentence.
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
