i'm so desperate for a drink right now i looked up the recipe to make pruno
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
im bored tell me something entertaining
You got period blood on my carpet. I lied to my mom and said it was jam.
Hey bro u need to come home now, me and andy just had a 15 minute conversation about fig newtons. f this bong
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
Be happy for me... Or horny... Or be a really good friend and feel what I want you to feel. Jealousy
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Randomize
