It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
this is what happens when you pick a roommate a year in advance.. she ends up hating you for hooking up with for of her extended family members
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
Randomize