Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
Is it wrong that the only reason I'd want Savannah in my wedding party is to watch her whore around and drink?
Apparently I tried my hand at mustard juggling. I wasn't very good.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
he sent me a green and gold dick pic and advised me I needed to come drive the snake from Ireland.
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