If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
It's like a choose-your-own-adventure. But the adventure is already chosen for you. And it sucks.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
me + whiskey = a bad person
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
Randomize
