check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
can you blow me for old times sake
only for old times sake
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
I went to bed early to get up and have a cup of coffee and watch a Sunday sunrise; and again you come home with no shirt and more stamps than my passport. Get the fuck up now, you are taking an Uber to waffle house. The order is in you name.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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