Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
I'm going to fake an anxiety attack to get to the front of the line. Save me some brisket.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
Randomize